Pregnancy + Parenthood

Meet the Couple that Plans to Be Pregnant at the Same Time

3 min read
Pam and Dali are starting their journey to parenthood—and are actually hoping to carry their pregnancies at the same time.
Pam and Dali are starting their journey to parenthood—and are actually hoping to carry their pregnancies at the same time.

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Picture the life-changing road to becoming a parent: the peaks and valleys, the endless questions, the confusion about what the heck is happening in your body, the unbelievable thrill as you imagine what lies ahead. Now, take that image and double it—and then you might have an idea of what the next year holds for Pam Reynoso and Idalisse “Dali” Sepúlveda.

The couple—who are the founders behind Soft Femme, a Brooklyn-based shop that celebrates the intersection of femininity and vulnerability—recently embarked on their journey to parenthood, with a unique twist: They both plan on carrying pregnancies at the same time. And they’re already halfway there. Dali just entered her second trimester, and Pam is hoping to conceive in the coming weeks.

While the decision to try to do it all at once was certainly major, the pair knows it’s ultimately the right path for them. For one thing: “Our donor plans to retire soon, and it’s important to us that our kids share the same donor,” they share. “So it just made sense for both of us to both try within a few months of one another.”

And they have no illusions about the impending shift into overdrive. “We expect that our future is about to get very chaotic and stressful. But we know that it’s going to be full of love, and we can’t wait to be moms.”

Below, the couple shares more about how they’re preparing themselves for co-motherhood.


On the pressures of feeling “ready”…

“We felt drained from just getting our ducks in a row before we could start trying to conceive. There’s a lot of family planning that goes on for a same-sex couple and a lot of hurdles to overcome. Once we were able to start we didn’t even have the energy. So we took a couple of steps back and postponed everything for a few months so that we could prepare our bodies.”

On their pre-pregnancy rituals…

“In the beginning, we started becoming very conscious of what we ate—we started favoring more superfoods and including nutrient-rich ingredients in all meals. Since Dali was going to start trying first, she started taking Ritual’s prenatal multivitamins. Shortly after, she stopped drinking alcohol. We also started tracking our sleep and made sure to get eight hours every night. We also started tracking our cycles and learned to identify our ovulation peak days. So basically, we started listening to our bodies.”

On their conception process…

“To be honest, for us it was a very intimate and beautiful process. We’re lucky that we didn’t have such a clinical experience since we opted for using a known donor.”


On prioritizing self-care during this major life moment…

“For starters, Ritual has been our go-to prenatal multivitamin for several months now—it’s literally become part of our morning routine.

“Other than that, we’re definitely taking time to rest while we can before the babies arrive. We are trying to maintain a consistent bedtime routine. There’s usually a set of tasks we feel obligated to complete before we snooze away, but we’ve turned bedtime into an almost religious experience: We know we won’t get much sleep in the near future, so we’ve become super sensitive about our nighttime routine. We complete our million and one tasks before we call it a night and that has turned into quite the ritual.”

On what they’re looking forward to most…

“One of the things we look forward to the most is looking at the world in a new way through our children’s perspective. Rather than trying to find each other in their eyes, we’re looking forward to seeing the wonder they may see in the things that bring us joy. As a same-sex couple, we know that our children will not have both of our genetic composition, so we’re excited to see what interests they’ll share with us.”


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